As Another Year Begins

I was humbled and tickled by all of the lovely birthday wishes that I received from you, my family, my friends and my wonderful blogging buddies.  This photo was taken at my birthday dinner.  Our adorable waiter, Emerlito, decided that he needed to be in the picture with me to memorialize the moment.  Mark and our Angels took me out to one of our favorite fondue restaurants.  That steaming pot in the middle of the table is melted chocolate.  What more could anyone require for a happy, happy birthday? 

Another year has passed for me, as another one now begins and I am choosing to begin this year just as I did the last one and the one before that.  With a heart filled with hope.  

I would like to share my favorite quote with you, as it is something that has buoyed my spirit from sinking too low at times when I needed something to grab hold of.

Hope is the thing with feathers, that perches in the soul, and sings the tune without words, and never stops at all.

-Emily Dickinson

I could not have said it any better myself.

I appreciate everyone who stops by my site.  Each one of you brightens my days in ways which I cannot describe.  Thank you.

With love,

Debbie

Viewing Life From a Different Distance

Watching fireworks from a distance provides the observer with bursts of brilliant color, beautiful shapes and perfectly choreographed fire dances.  A show put on by individuals who have spent a lot of time studying Pyrotechnics. Everything appears to be perfectly orchestrated and seems to go off without any glitches.  A vision of near perfection when observed from the proper distance.

Move in a bit closer and the dance takes on a whole different look.  Random explosions that seem to occur without any rhyme or reason.  Black and green smoke fill the skies and float upon the surface of the water creating a confusing scene.  The dark skies light up, yet the explosions seem to be just that...Explosions.  Sudden and not easily observable while watching from a distance. Haphazard and chaotic, yet still strangely beautiful.

This was my experience with fireworks, this year.  We were able to observe one show at a distance and it was perfect and lovely.  Something that has become fairly familiar after spending forty-six summers of my life observing Fourth of July displays.  However, less than a fourth of a mile from my front yard on the ocean, a very different scene took place.  Fire seemed to settle on the water as ringlets of smoke cascaded down from the heavens.  The "oooh's and ahh's" which usually rise from the crowds of observers were replaced with an almost eery quiet.  A different kind of awe was taking place.  The awe of viewing the same exact scene from a very different perspective.

Life is like that.  Perception can be variant depending upon where something is being viewed from.  From one perspective, things may seem to be easy and charmed, yet when looked at from another viewpoint, the ordinary is suddenly extraordinary.  The things we expect are replaced with things we have never seen.  We are suddenly struck with the realization that there is never really only one way in which to view our lives.  There are many, many ways, once we open ourselves up to different distances...Different perspectives.

This year has been a lot like that for me.  In many ways, I feel as if I have been observing my life from a different distance.  Sometimes, chaotic and uglier than anything I have ever experienced before.  Sometimes, just as I had expected.  And sometimes, strangely beautiful from distances I never imagined standing at.

May we all remain mindful of the many, many different perspectives from which our lives can be viewed.  May we keep our spirits open to looking at life from where ever we might end up at any given moment.  May we remain open to the views from a different distance for in some ways, those are the places from which we can learn the most.

I Strive to Someday be as Good as my Dog Believes I am

For no particular reason, I decided it was time to share these four-legged angels with you.  I can do that since it is the eve of my 46th year on this earth.  I like to grant myself special permission to do frivolous things on my birthday.  It makes me happy.  And what else is there, if we can't make ourselves happy once in a while.  The handsome, burly gentleman above is Duke.  He lives next door to our beach house.  He loves to escape the confines of his yard to come over and say hello to our dog, Becca.  I'm pretty sure they have a secret crush on each other.
This little lady is my sister, Lulu.  She is a Wire-Haired Dauchsund who belongs to my Dad and my Step-Mother.  I know for a fact that she is the favorite daughter.  Hmmph...Daddy's little girl!
The Newest addition to our family is my baby brother, Rambo.  A crazy shitzu who also belongs to my Dad.  The reason his name is Rambo is because he runs around the room ramming his ten pound body into anything or anyone he pleases.  Sure, he looks innocent enough here...
And last, but never least, is my sweet girl, Becca.  She is some sort of mix which may or may not include Dalmation and Lab.  Whatever she happens to be, she is almost always the heartbeat which lays at my feet.  
As my angel daughters grow up, Becca and I become more and more attached to one another. We understand each other.  I understand that she wants a bite of everything I eat and she understands that she must kiss me when I am feeling sad.  It's a very symbiotic relationship.

May you give yourself permission to indulge in something entirely frivolous.  I bet it will make you smile, and you look so lovely with a smile on your face!

Life in Pictures-Part Three: The Afterglow

After Angel Daughter Number Two's graduation, we went out to dinner.  The day turned out a little differently than we had planned because of my Dad's illness.  It would have been unsafe and unwise for him to drive two and a half hours each way to attend AD 2's graduation, and so, because God granted me a very empathetic and compassionate spirit, I decided to extend an invitation to my Mother's side of the family.(Let's just say they caused me unnecessary pain and grief for months after my brother's death.  Easy target, I suppose.)  The proverbial olive branch needed to be extended and was received with great enthusiasm by everyone except for my beloved brother's wife.  She has dug her way into so many sick and delusional lies that she must now hold strong to them in order to save face.  Not a good way to live life, especially while trying to raise two young daughters without the benefit of their father.  My brother, God rest his soul, would be absolutely infuriated by her behavior, as is the rest of my family.  Unfortunately, she has convinced everyone that she should be feared.  She holds my two nieces as the ultimate trump card.  I have already lost them and my only brother.  She cannot take anything else away from me.  And so, I am trying in whatever ways I can, to find a way back into my dear niece's lives.  I do not, nor will I ever fear evil.  I will not give up on my two other angels.  They need me as much as I need them.  This post was not supposed to be about the things which have been lost, so I will end this train of thought only to say that life does not always turn out the way that we expected it to.  Sometimes we have to fight for the way that things should be.

Dinner turned out to be a very happy and celebratory event.  It felt really good to be with my step-brother and his wife.  As the girls made their ways home and to other events, we lingered over dessert and talked about future gatherings.  I am very grateful to still have a step-brother even though we were not raised together as children.  We were brought together by my mother and her husband about twenty-five years ago.  We are family.

As with the way that things go with three teenage girls living at home, our doorbell rang at two am.  Everyone was asleep except for Angel Daughter Number Three and her Angel Friends.  When they heard the doorbell ring, they screamed(if you haven't heard teenage girls scream, lately, you are very, very lucky) and came tearing up the stairs.  I met them before they woke my husband and told them to calm down.  Of course they wanted me to investigate, and as soon as I turned on the porch light and looked outside, I was the first to observe the newest addition to our landscaping.  As the four little faces peaked out the door behind me and saw what had happened they all started laughing hysterically.  It was then that they took off up the slope because they spotted the perpetrators.  As I stood by myself in the middle of the street wearing nothing but my PJ's, feeling semi-comatose and bleary-eyed, I decided to run inside to get my camera.  When the angels came back, they told me that they caught several of Angel Daughter Number Four's little guy friends running away.  I snapped a couple of pictures because I was mostly unconscious, and told them to go back to bed.  And NOT to wake AD4, who would have been up for the rest of the night planning her revenge.  Teenagers...and hormones...I will survive, I will survive...
Nice job, huh?
The next day, we headed down to our beach house for a graduation get-together.  Notice the Batman pinata which was the hit of the party!  Of course my husband chose the Batman theme because he just knew that AD2 would love it.  AD1 broke it open with her brute-like strength and the kids went in for the bounty!
Teenagers and sugar.  Twice as sweet:)
Here's AD1 receiving an adorable snuggle from her boyfriend, The Cheesemiester.  I love it when she looks like this.  Total, natural bliss.
Finally, we said good-bye to Grandma Dot.  She is Mark's mom who lives in New Jersey.  We flew her in so that she could celebrate the day with us.  It's nice knowing that we will see her again in a year when AD1 graduates from college.  Her visits are too far and few between!  We miss you, Grandma Dot.

And so as life slows down a bit, and my birthday approaches next week, I will be doing some more reflecting about life, love, and purpose.  

On this Fourth of July, as we celebrate our independence as a nation, I wish for you a sky that is filled with the brilliant colors of fireworks.  May you find your corner of the beach blanket and know, as you gaze up into the sky, that you are not alone in this great, big, crazy world.  Never, ever alone...even when you are.

Love,

Debbie