Learning New Tricks and A Very Special Welcome and Thank You

There is something about an old dog that makes my heart grow indescribably full.  Maybe it's the grey hairs that mysteriously pop up above the soulful eyes and kissable snout.  Maybe it's the expressions of absolute need, admiration and love which have been well cultivated and well used over the years.  Or maybe it's in the knowing that our beloved dogs are with us for far too short of a time.  That one day they are puppies romping around like they will live forever and the next, they are our closest, most loving companions holding onto our deepest, darkest secrets as if their lives depend upon it.  Whatever it is, an old dog can tug at the heartstrings just as strongly as any fluff ball of a puppy ever has.  

Becca, our lovely Dalmatian/Lab/who knows what else, just turned ten years old.  Thank goodness she is in good health and seems to be made of good strong stock.(although my family says she is WAY too chubby, but that's another story for another day)  My youngest Angel picked her out on her way home from pre-school one day and somehow, she instantly became ours.  She was four months old when we brought her home, and she came into our house full of spunk!  We had another wonderful dog named, Elijah, at the time and instead of having to worry about him attacking her, she went after him like nobody's business.  Poor Elijah who weighed in at about one hundred pounds just cowered under his daddy's leg waiting for the attack of the killer puppy to end.  Becca and Elijah went on to become great friends, over the years, and sadly when Elijah passed away last year at the age of nine, Becca kept watch for him for a very, very long time.  Not easy explaining death to a dog.  But Becca bucked up and decided to stick closer to me.  I can't say I ever really minded being that my husband is at work all day and my daughters are either in school or away at college.  She is wonderful company.

And as I sit here typing busily away, Becca is snuggled securely at my feet, deep happy snores coming from her beautiful grey snout.  I am learning to cherish the time now that my Angel daughters are fourteen, sixteen, eighteen and twenty-one.  Not that I didn't cherish the time before, I just had much, much more to distract me from the moments.  The moments when you realize that not only are your children getting older, but so are you.  When I look at my old dog, it makes me want to slow time down so that I can have more.  More moments, more gratitude, more connections that are lasting.  Something about having an old dog can do that to you.  I suppose you can teach an old dog(well not that old!) new tricks.
On a totally different subject, I must take a moment to welcome any new readers who have popped over from Melissa's incredible blog, The Inspired Room.  Melissa, one of my favorite and oldest BFF's, featured my blog as her "blog of the week" and I have received countless visitors from her site today.  Thank you, Melissa, for featuring my blog and for introducing new friends to me.  You are such a talented and beautiful soul and it shines through in everything that you do.  Even as I have witnessed your site evolve and grow, you have remained the same sweet gal that you were when your blog was just an itty-bitty.  If you haven't already discovered Melissa's blog, please pay her a visit.  You will be inspired to live a more beautiful life!  To all of Melissa's readers who have come over to check out my blog, I wish I could offer you a cup of tea and some chocolate!  Instead, I am giving you these cyber-flowers to brighten up your day.  Please feel free to leave me a comment and say hello!  I really enjoy connecting with new blogging friends and visiting new sites.  Please don't be shy!  I know that Melissa has the best readers.  I do hope that you will stop by again.  It's nice to have you here!

May the moments that cause your heart to flutter happen slowly enough for you to hold onto them.  May you recognize the things that make you feel safe and loved and connected.  And like an old dog, may you live for right now, not constantly worrying about what tomorrow will bring.(Because all we truly have is now, isn't it?)

Reflections on What Must be

My youngest Angel got ahold of my camera and decided to take some pictures on her own the other day.  I must have reprimanded her several times about not wanting to have my picture taken because I wasn't wearing any make-up, my hair was a mess, blah, blah, blah.  And then I stopped.  I stopped because I remembered that none of that truly matters.  I stopped because I remembered that turn-around is fair play and I certainly take enough pictures of my children when they protest.  I stopped because I got close enough to my husband to feel drawn into him and what we must deal with as a constant and solid team.
We are on the precipice of making some very important, life-altering decisions right now.  Decisions I never even dreamed that I might someday have to make.  Decisions that require the right amount of strength, patience and solidarity.  Decisions that fill me with equal amounts of fear and steadfastness.
But I have never been one to back down from what I know is right.  And Mark has always believed in justice.  And we have always taught our Angels to stand up for what they believe even when the journey upon which they are about to embark is something that might change the course of their lives as they have known them.
Looking back on these pictures, I no longer see a moment when I was worried about how I looked on the outside.  I see a moment captured by our youngest Angel as we walked along the beach.  I see a moment of unsureness mixed with resolution.  I see a moment of solidarity which assures me that everything will be okay in the end as long as we stick together as a team.  As long as we stick together as a family of six.

Yesterday, someone asked me if there was anything, anything at all that I wouldn't do for one of my children.  Without a second thought, my answer was an absolute no.  Now I must apply that same answer to a situation which is only one step further out, but just as close to my heart.  I must put my money where my mouth is, so to speak.  And as I ask myself why?  Why bother, why put myself and my family through this?  Why not turn a blind eye and just go about my own life?  Screw 'em.  The answer comes crashing hard into my heart and mind.  Love.  Devotion.  And being able to look at myself in the mirror whether I have make-up on or not.

Now those are some thoughts that are worth holding onto, long after the photos will be forgotten.