Favorite Children and A Mother's Prerogative

I must admit something. I have a favorite child. I do. Those of you who know me, are probably shaking your heads right now thinking that I am half-crazy for admitting this.(Put down the phone, Dad.) But it is true, and I do. Twenty-two and a half years ago, God began blessing me with daughter, after daughter, after daughter, with yet another daughter! And no, to answer your question, we were not trying for a boy, we are not Catholic or Mormon, and we do know what causes that. Once we had our oldest Angel Daughter, I dreamed of having another one so that she would have a sister. After Angel Daughter Number Two was born and I became pregnant yet again, I figured I was on a roll so why stop now. And by the time Angel Daughter Number Three bounced happily into this world and we were blessed with our one and only surprise baby, AD4, I truly wanted another little girl. I decided that at that point, I would not even have known what to do with a boy! So, with four Angel Daughters, it is hard not to have a favorite.

But herein lies the truth. At any given moment, and it can change as frequently as the hormones do in our mostly girly family, my favorite child changes. Another Mother once told me that her Mother once told her that the favorite child is the one who needs you the most at that time. Interesting perspective, but somewhat different from mine. For me, it is the one who breezes through the door to ask me if it is okay to wear a certain shirt for a job interview. It is the one who calls me to excitedly describe her day. It is the one who hugs me so hard that it ends up taking my breath away. It is the one who makes me laugh so hard that I do lose my breath. It is the one who walks into my room eating an after-school snack looking like a little forest pixie. Ask me which one is my favorite, and I just might tell you. Ask me again in ten minutes and I can guarantee that the answer will change. That is a Mother's prerogative.
I took these pictures of Angel Daughter Number Three a couple of weeks ago. We were browsing around the little shops in Laguna Beach, when I had a "favorite child" moment. At seventeen years old, AD3 is going through some changes that all adolescent girls go through at one time or another. She can be very tentative, private and quiet. It is a stage in a Mother's life which is sometimes difficult to navigate. I am watching my adorable little girl transform into a woman, right before my eyes.
But then there are moments like this. Moments in which the silly little girl melds with the blossoming young woman and my heart is overtaken with awe.
Moments when I can still see who she once was, while reveling in who she is now. Moments when I can enjoy all of the parts of the same. The very same.

I don't think that I have introduced you to Jacob yet. Jacob is Angel Daughter Three's boyfriend. He is studying to be a Firefighter while working hard and attending college. I like that AD3 can be more of who she is when she is with Jacob. I like that he is not afraid to be goofy! I like it when my girls are content.

As my family moves forward into yet another uncharted phase of life, I must admit that I will always have a favorite. Each one of my Angel Daughters is my favorite child at one moment or another. I am sure that each one of them has a favorite parent or sister from moment to moment, as well. But the truth, my truth, is that it takes four parts to make a whole. And for me, it takes four daughters to make a favorite.