Prehistoric Angels

With all of the nuances of a nonevent, the seasons slowly change.  Tiny transformations barely noticeable. Overlapping. Inconspicuous.  Initially subtle.  I watched as pelican after pelican soared gracefully past my window, today.  Some in large flocks, creating linear shapes against the backdrop of the sky.  Others, singularly making their way along along the warm autumn air currents, wings spread as if their spans might reach from cloud to cloud.  Prehistoric looking angels heading south towards Mexico paying their last respects to the Southern California coast.  Another summer spent.  Another fall burning its way into a late California heat spell.  Another year into the autumn of my journey.

There is something about observing the way in which nature denotes the transformations of one season into another.  Intuitive.  Profound.  Exquisitely complex.  Internal clocks shifting until there is a new balance found.  From where we have been to where we are going.  A time to move from one place to another and then another.

And all along the way, we spend some time in each season.  Hopefully nurturing the present while anticipating the future and building upon the past.  Each season coming and going like a checkpoint along the journey of our life.  There is a flow to all of it.  A quintessential rhythm rounding out the seasons.  Winter.  Spring.  Summer.  Fall.  Winter.  Spring.  Summer.  Fall.

And just as the Pelicans make their way back down south each autumn, following the fibrous evanescent thread of instinct, we also journey our way through the sequential seasons of our lives.  Making our way through the translucent veil which segues the very subtle transformation of one season into another, into another.  Gossamer.  Gauzy.  Ethereal.  Our spirits open wide like the wings of a pelican making its way back to home.  Carrying all that has been, all that is, and all that will be.

Happy Autumn...

Learning to be Open

I must admit that since I have been spending more time at the beach, I have developed a new sense of appreciation and awe for the seagulls.  As the weather grows chillier, most of the beach-goers have packed it in for the winter and I find myself wandering along long stretches of shoreline without another soul in sight.  I look towards the seagulls as companions, as angels who remind me that I am never truly alone on my journey.

Occasionally, a very brazen seagull will follow behind me on foot, using it's voice to remind me that it is hungry and would like me to provide it with food.  I turn around and try to convince the little guy that I do not have anything to share otherwise I surely would, but they never seem to believe me.  So I walk along with my companion in tow, quietly talking to him about my thoughts until he gives up and returns to his flock.  On this particular day, however, I was approached not by ground, but by sky.  At first, it wasn't quite registering that this seagull was trying to get my attention, but then...

He gave me the eye.  I almost turned around and gave him that famous line, "Are you talking to me?", but then I realized that he was probably way too young to get it, so I just laughed out loud instead.  I thought about running away, as his wingspan was a lot more intimidating when he was only several feet away from me, but I was far too amused to give into fear.
He lingered effortlessly in the air for quite some time and I was awestruck by this glorious creature, a creature who was trying to communicate with me as I stood there taking pictures of him.  I think he found the camera to be quite a curious object and so we stared at each other for a few seconds.  He hovered closer and I was amazed by the intelligence that seemed to project through his eyes.  This bird wanted to connect in some way, and whether that was out of his need for food or curiosity,  the intention was very, very clear.  He sought me out, got my attention, and held it until we made a connection of sorts.
As he flew back to be with the rest of his flock, I couldn't shake the feeling that something very spiritual had just occurred.  I could have just brushed the experience off as just a coincidence, but then I know in my soul that there really are no coincidences.  I also know that angels can approach us in so many different forms if we remain open to their appearances.  Lucky me...

If your travels bring you face to face with an angel, I hope that you will keep your spirit open to the possibility.  You are not alone.  You are never alone.

"For most gulls, it is not flying that matters, but eating.

 For this gull, though, it was not eating that mattered,

 but flight."

-From Jonathan Livingston Seagull

Calling All Angels

I need a sign to let me know you're here

All of these lines are being crossed over the atmosphere

I need to know that things are gonna look up

'Cause I see us drowning in a sea spilled from a cup

When there is no safe place and no safe place to put my head

When you feel the world shake from the words that are said

And I'm calling all angels

I'm calling all you angels

-Angels Baseball theme song by Train

The Four Angels Momma baseball team happens to be The Anaheim Angels.  If you have ever seen the 1994 movie, Angels in the Outfield, then you are already familiar with a wonderful story of hope and faith.  I like that our local team was the inspiration for such a wonderful movie.  I love that our team is called The Angels!(Even though Mark is also a huge Mets fan and that AD1 used to sleep with a stuffed pillow we called Mr. Met.)  Mark has taken our Angels to a countless number of games.  Angel Daughter Number Two is in the process of auditioning for a position in which she would represent the team with her incredible spirit.  Although I don't attend as many games with my family as I would like to be able to, I do enjoy the spirit and the camaraderie that having a "family" team initiates.  I love listening to Mark and the girls talk about the team and who their favorite players are.  I love the bonding that naturally occurs as they cheer for their team.  My husband is, and always has been, an absolute jock, so it is nice knowing that he has daughters who understand that love.

Several months ago, Mark and I attended a fundraiser for our synagogue.  As part of the live auction, someone donated their box for an Angel's game.  Knowing how much Mark and our Angels love going to the games, my paddle(the one that is raised to bid on something) somehow got very involved in the bidding.  By the end of the auction, we were the proud owners of twelve tickets in a private box.  It was an absolute win-win situation!  We were able to support our temple, while also supporting our home team!  I love it when that happens.  
Here I am, standing in the very best spot in the whole world.(which could be anywhere, as far as I'm concerned!)  Surrounded by my Angels.  As they get older and become more involved in their own lives, these moments sometimes become too few and far between.  When I am with my family, everything feels right with the world.
Their love for one another becomes more and more apparent, the older they become.  Watching them together, as a group, reminds me that Mark and I have done what we came here to do.  We have created a loving family and although life is not without some very rough spots, we can get through it if we stick together.
One of my freshman angels!  I have two right now, as AD2 is a college freshman and AD4 is a High School freshman.  I miss my college girls so much when they are at school.
In the back row, a couple of AD3's Angel friends sit next to her.  Next to AD3 is "T", AD1's sweet Angel roommate(our daughter, when she is away from her parents who live in Oregon),and AD 1 and her lovely boyfriend, The Cheesmiester.

In the front row is AD2's adorable, funny roommate, AD2 and then AD4's beautiful Angel friend and AD4.  I love that AD2's roommate felt comfortable enough with us to ham it up in front of the camera!  She fits right in with our silly family.

You can see my love sitting up there in the background, focusing on the game.
I drive them a bit crazy with the camera, but they have learned that if they just grin and bear it(Get it?  Grin and bear it...tee-hee.), then I will go away faster.
AD1 and The Cheesemeister.  They are too cute.(We missed you, Joshua.)
AD4 and her Angel friend.

AD3 displaying her team spirit!
And what made the night even better was that the Angels rallied and beat the Rangers 7-5!  It was an awesome game.
Did I mention how much I love my Angels and their wonderful Angel friends?  It makes me happy to see them so happy.(T, things will get easier, I promise, dear one.  Please be gentle with yourself.)

May you find moments to enjoy and fully enjoy the moments when you find them.  May your own angels surround you.  May you feel their embrace.  May you listen to their whispers whether they come from an earthly angel or on the barely noticed feathery wisps of a passing breeze.